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shivkun/README.md

🧑‍🚀 Welcome to my GitHub

…where nothing happens, on purpose.

No Longer Coding


FAQ:

Q: Why don’t you have any projects here?
A: Because modern programming cured me of joy.

Q: Wait, what happened?
A: Imagine trying to build a house, but every brick is from a different country, labeled in a language no one speaks, and the instruction manual just says “Good luck 💅.”

Q: There’s so much free info online!
A: Free? You mean the $599 “Ultimate Junior Dev MegaCourse” that ends with “Set up a portfolio and pray”?
Yeah. Free.

Q: What about the community?
A: It’s amazing. Especially if you love sarcasm, superiority complexes, and being told “just read the docs” when the docs are literally a broken link to an empty page.

Q: So are you done coding forever?
A: Let’s call it a trial separation. If programming decides to work on itself, maybe we’ll talk.
Until then, I’m seeing other hobbies.


🔥 Hire Me Never™

I’m not available.
I’m not freelancing.
I’m not open to collab.
I’m free.


📉 My Programming Journey (a totally serious chart)

graph TD
    A[Got excited about code] --> B[Taught myself everything]
    B --> C[Started building cool stuff]
    C --> D[Discovered documentation is a lie]
    D --> E[Asked for help online]
    E --> F[Got roasted by 14-year-olds with anime avatars]
    F --> G[Tried a bootcamp]
    G --> H[Got a badge, no skills]
    H --> I[Burnout hits]
    I --> J[Questioned life choices]
    J --> K[Wrote sarcastic GitHub README]
    K --> L((Peace))
Loading

🎁 And Finally… My Programming Career in One GIF:

burn-it-down


Thanks for stopping by.
Feel free to browse my empty repositories — or don’t.
They're not going anywhere.

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